Tuesday, August 31, 2010

How do you say Gossip & Rumors in Vietnamese?

If you haven't guessed by the title, Gossip from the Girls Room, A Blogtastic! Novel is now making it's way to Vietnam!

So this makes a total of three countries, including China and Spain!

And even better, Vietnam is also picking up Rumors from the Boys Room, A Blogtastic! Novel, which will be released here in Spring 2012!

Stay tuned for an ARC giveaway coming your way soon!

Ghosthunt-The Two Story Barn Part 2

If you missed out on yesterdays post, you can read Part 1.

So, there we are. Huddled around the tape recorder, listening to the playback. We hear the guy repeating his question on the tape, "Is anyone here?" then complete silence...then...footsteps shuffling. In. The. Room. With. Us.

We never moved. The four us. Never Moved. And the whole time during that recording we never heard a sound. Not one single sound. And now, here on the recorder, there is the distinct shuffling of feet, loud enough to tell that it is indeed shuffling. And then it stops. Then more silence. Then the recorder clicks off. That was the whole 20 seconds of what was recorded.

And I can testify that what I heard on that tape is something I didn't hear while it was recording. And that is what creeped me out. So when the rest of our group came back to the barn, we gathered in the next room with an old tractor. One of the guys sat on the tractor and others took pictures with their cameras. "Orbs" showed up in pics and our lead psychic said we had to debunk this because orbs can easily be dust and/or insects. So, everyone stomped on the ground, creating more dust and took more pictures. The "orbs" that showed up were small white circles, very light. The psychic then said, we would recreate the scene to determine if there were orbs from any spirits.

The psychic then said, "If there are any spirits here, sit in Johns lap." John was the guy in the tractor. As she said that, everyone began taking pictures and two things simutaneously happened.

1. Four people's cameras died, as in their fully charged batteries drained, all at the same time. I was one of these four. This is the reason why I don't have any pictures for this post.

2. The people who were lucky enough to still have working cameras all captured the same thing-a huge, bright glowing orb. Hovering right above Johns legs. As in, his lap.

Hmmm, I didn't realize you can instruct dust where to go. Or can you?

The upstairs of the barn, the loft...was way demonic looking. Pentagrams were drawn all over the floor and things written on the walls. There were also gaping holes in the floor boards that were wide enough for a person's leg to fall through. No thank you! Back downstairs I happily skipped.

We were constantly drawn back to The Closet, but the last time we went back, it was sooo warm. And the creepy feeling that was once there was...well, not so creepy anymore. Strange, right?

So, you want to know the history of this barn? Well, in the bottom corner there are pews piled up. This is explained as coming from a church on the property that "accidentally" burned down. And in this barn, a young girl was hung by her mother. It is said that this girl now sits in a corner and cries. That is why some believe they feel overcome by sadness in The Closet. Nobody knew of this info until the very end.

And the people who presently live in the house next door talk about how they are cursed and how bad things have happened to them since living there. And apparently only 3wks ago, someone in there house just died. Yikes!

Whistle Blows.

Time to move on to the Wells Fargo Coach Stop. But better be careful walking the long dark path going there. Because one of the investigators, well, she just tripped about 30min ago and smashed her head in and had to be rushed to the hospital....

*Come back tomorrow to hear what happens at the Coach Stop when my friend Frankie has an "Actual Physcial Experience" that I witness.

Want to hear some good news? Read my other post for today in which I have terrific news from my agent!!!

Ghosthunt: The Wells Fargo Coach Stop Part 3

Monday, August 30, 2010

Ghosthunt: The Two Story Barn

I walked up the long, steep driveway. The chirping of crickets and the shuffling of our feet on the gravel was the only sound. If it wasn't for our flashlights, we wouldn't be able to see our hands in front of our faces. Yes, it was that dark. We had left behind the city lights and exchanged it for this 22-ace property built upon an indian burial ground. It was a private residence and people still lived in the house that occupied the land. They said it was cursed. That many bad things happend there. What exactly had happened...I would soon find out.

There were a LOT of people that had shown up for this event. I wasn't expecting so many. We were all split into groups. Each group would take one place at a time-Two story barn, house, one level barn, old Wells Fargo Coach Stop. We would have 45min at each place. Once we heard the whistle blow, we would all gather to report our findings.

I had with me my tape recorder and a digital camera, so I got to be an investigator. Our team lead was celebrity psychic, Belinda Bentley. First stop-the two story barn. My friend Frankie, my brother Brandon, and one other girl made a bee-line straight for the closet on the bottom. The second we opened the door, it was freeeeezing inside. And it was creepy. Everything about it from the writing on the walls to the overall feeling from being inside. I was shivering, and it wasn't from just the cold. Frankie and the other girl both said at the same time, "I feel overhwelmed with sadness. I want to cry." Later on, we found out that other people said this exact same thing. Some even reported saying this back in June during the first investigation.

This is the front of the barn. Above is the loft. Notice that chair? It plays
significance in this story later on. The lady in the pink is our Lead, Belinda
and see that open door behind the man in black? That's the door to
"the closet."

We did an EVP in that room, which is an Electronic Voice Phenomena. What you do is you take out your recorder, push record and ask a question. You wait 10-20 seconds between each question. Then you play back with the hopes of hearing something on tape that you couldn't hear with your ears.

Every time I tried to push record on mine, it wouldn't record. So I would leave that closet and try recording outside of that room. It would work fine. I tried this about eight different times, all with the same results. So we had someone else go in the room with us to do the EVP.

The inside of The Closet room. It was pitch black, but the flash from my camera
did really well at capturing this wall. The space was about 12x12. Creepy, eh?

We actually sneaked away from the group so it would be much quieter around us. It was just my brother, Frankie, and this other guy with the recorder. He had the recorder laying flat on his palm, pushed record and said, "Is there anyone here with us?" We were absolutely silent, frozen. He clicked his recorder off and we left the room. Outside, we huddled and listened closely to the playback. What we heard on the tape indicated we were not alone in that room...

To Be Continued.....

Come back tomorrow to read what happens!

Ghosthunt: The Two Story Barn Part 2

Friday, August 27, 2010

Are you a Brave Blogger?

This is a character i'm working on for a new project. While this is her reaction to something very trivial, i'm guessing this could possibly be my reaction on tomorrows ghost hunt. Although right now i'm feeling quite confident that I won't be scared since i'm really just super excited. Plus, I've been writing all of this into my book so it feels like i'm stepping into my actual story. BUT....things can always change once I get there. And it's dark. And things start to look a bit more creepy than I image. And then you know how your eyes like to play tricks on you and when you have ghosts on the brain and IF weird things happen, well...I might just end up a mess.

So I'm giving out an award today. And I'm still behind on passing on other awards that have been given to me. But this one I made. It is the Brave Blogger Award, and it actually has a double meaning. Instead of listing names on who should receive this, I'm listing who should take this.

1. If you are brave enough to follow me on Facebook and/or Twitter tomorrow night (starting 8pm pacific time) while I give live updates, then take this award. You are brave for following along on a real ghost hunt!

2. If you have overcame a fear, ie. submitted to an agent, trapped yourself in a room with spiders, or any of THESE, then you deserve a high five AND this award.

3. If you think my character is cute or just stupid looking and you're brave enough to comment and tell me so, then please, take this award! And I promise, my feelings won't be hurt. Much.

And if you do take this award, please pass along the braveness to anyone you know who deserves it!

Happy Friday!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Bored in Walmart

You’re in Walmart, and you’re bored. Or you’re just in a defiant type of mood. Or maybe going through a rebellious phase. This happens, right? Well, here are some things you can do to help offset that boredom, or contribute to your rebellion. If you have a different store preference, then I’m sure most of these suggestions can be applied there too. Well, with the exception of #11.

1. Take your shoes off and try to return them at Customer Service. This works really well if your shoes are especially worn. And dirty. Maybe stomp through mud before entering the store.

2. Ride a bicycle through the store. Tell anyone that gives you a strange look that you’re taking it for a test drive. Bonus factor: if the bike has a horn, use it. That’s what it’s there for.

3. Tailgate. Follow people through the store, staying only a few feet behind them. Do this until they leave. Or threaten to file a restraining order.

4. Randomly throw items over into the next isle. Where did THAT come from?

5. Find two people walking closely together. Run between them and yell “Red Rover!”

6. Two Words: Marco Polo. Or make it your own: Ralph Lauren.

7. Indoor (shopping) cart races!

8. Indoor freeze tag. Include random customers. You don’t want anyone feeling left out.

9. Go to the toy isle: Dodge ball! Again, include random customers.

10. While in the toy isle, find Barbie. Sit in the middle of the isle and brush her hair. Tell her why she’s too good for Ken.

11. Announce loudly that you will sue for false advertising. They don’t sell Walls. File a complaint with Customer Service. Note: You should probably do this after you try to return your shoes.

12. Buy a pack of gum. Buy another pack of gum and return to the same cashier. Repeat several times. Pretend like you’re seeing that cashier for the first time. Ask them how they’re day is going.

13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, cover your ears and yell, “It’s those voices again!”

14. Visit the outdoor section. Take a cartful of hunting knives to the register. Ask the cashier if they know where the antidepressants are.

15. As the cashier scans your items, say, “BEEP” in a loud voice. Do this for every item. Do this for other customers’ items too.

16. Ask random customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

17. Challenge customers to duel-with tubes of gift-wrap.

18. When someone is behind you, walk very slowly. When they try to pass you, speed up.

19.  Buy a pair of pants that are obviously waaaaay too small for you (maybe shop in the childrens section). The next day go back and return them. When you do, proudly hold them up and say, "I need to return these. They're a bit big on me."

Do you have ideas you’d like to add ? Have you already tried some of these ideas (and did they work)?

*In case you missed some of my previous posts, you might like these:
No Spllenig Erors
Unusual Phobias
Painfully Obvious

Wednesday, August 25, 2010


First, let me say thank you to Jen for interviewing me on her blog! You're awesome!

Now, for some art updates. I've been dividing my time between making new art pieces for the Sac Horror Art Event and writing for a new project. Oh, and getting ready for the ghost hunt this weekend!  Which, BTW, I've decided will be on Twitter & Facebook (during the event) since I know some of you aren't on Twitter, so make sure to add me on FB if you haven't already and you want to see how all of this goes down! Of course i'll be posting about it on Monday too.

You might remember the before pictures from this post, Achy Breaky Art, and how I was experimenting with paper clay for the first time. So, I managed to get further along (although not quite done) on the art doll I was working on.

I'm working on her body now. I also have a super cool
dress for her. I'm thinking she'll be a "corpse bride."

I started a few smaller doll heads, and this below is one of them. I will be making her body soon, too. I haven't yet decided if she will be a sitting doll, or a hanging one.

She will be called "The Black Widow." I will be making
a spider for her hair, and her dress will be made
out of cobwebs.

This is The Crazy Mermaid, one of the finished ones that was shown as "before" in the other post.

And lastly, I tried something completely different and I love the end result. I used a wood plaque, painted it black with some red splatter, and made Zombie Girl out of paper clay to give it that 3D effect when hanging on a wall.

She isn't hanging up yet, but I took a pic of the side view so tha you
could see how she "pops" right off the wood. I used wool yarn for
hair and it's hard to see from these pics, but she's wearing the
cutest zombie boots ever!

Monday, August 23, 2010

Ghost Hunts and Voodoo Queens

I'm just now discovering the many joys of book research. I'm working on a new project, and to get the "feel" for it, i've started making some connections. For starters, Voodoo Queen, Bloody Mary, has graciously accepted my request to answer questions that me or my MC have for her (hmmm, don't you wonder what my story is about?).

AND, to actually experience something that will be related to my story, this Saturday, August 28th, I am going on an overnight ghosthunt! It's a private residence on 22 acres of land, the house is built on an Indian Burial Ground, a cemetery plot on the property, and a real Wells Fargo Coach Stop.

Apparently, the Paranormal Investigators leading this event went to this place in June and after hearing strange voices and whispers (from a child), seeing lights, following "shadow people" that made the cows act funny, among many other things. A photo was even taken of the group of the investigators, but when looking at the picture, the investigators were not n the picture. This was the conclusion of their written report.

*Note: EVP=Electronic Voice Phenomena

CONCLUSION: With all of the EVPs that were gathered and all of the multiple witnesses to various paranormal events, I have to deem this property as haunted. Other notes to this investigation is that Walter Recino gets a call from his girlfriend. His girlfriend is sitting next to him, she didn't dial his number, but his cell says it was her that called. A psychic picks up on a little girl with a bloody face. Jennifer Newell picks up on all kinds of activity...

And get this, this same team of Paranormal Invesigators (which include a team of psychics) were featured on our local newstation for another upcoming project. One that deals with solving a murder crime which you can read about HERE and HERE.

So as I was saying, book research. Fun stuff, right? I think it's important to get first hand experience to give your novel a "realistic" approach even though the story itself may veer off the realisic path.

I think I might do an all night Twitter Update while I'm at the overnight ghosthunt. Who's in?

Do YOU believe?

Friday, August 20, 2010

Guess That Character-The Big Reveal!!!

This was so much fun! I loved everyones comments and some of you were so creative! It was a blast and looked forward to reading each comment that came in and thank you to everyone who made guesses!

So, who was the closest? Did anyone get it right? I provided a picture below of what my character looks like, BUT, as you know, my character is more than just a pretty face. She is going through some sort of...change. And what better way to describe this...change, than to give you another snippet and you can hear the news from her parents for the first time just as she has.

Real Description of Kristy...

With long blonde waves, a fair complexion and brown eyes, Bridgit Mendler is your girl for who my character looks like. She's a no nonsense girl, comfortable in jeans and a tee but loves to dress up when the occassion calls for it. Not popular, but not a nobody, she has a close group of friends and a comfortable school life. Oh, AND a cute boyfriend. In fact, everything about her life screams normal and ordinary. Until the day after she turns 13 and her parents sit her down at the kitchen table to explain the "changes" that she's suddenly going through.


I’m sweating, my hands are shaking, and I feel so...disgusting. Like my face.

“What’s wrong with—“

“There’s no easy way to say this,” Mom interrupts.

Her and Dad exchange glances.

“Say what, Mom? Do I have some horrible disease? Am I dying? WHAT?”

My dad laughs. “Quite the opposite,” he says setting his coffee mug down.

“It’s not that bad,” he continues, smiling. “Not bad all all. If fact, it’s simply remarkable!”

Not that bad? Remarkable? Maybe because it’s not happening to you.

“You’ve come down with a bad case of acne.”


He’s kidding. He has got be kidding.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say, and then look at my mom. “THIS,” I say, pointing to my face, “IS NOT acne.”

“Honey, this will be hard for you to hear, but please let your dad explain.” Mom reaches over and holds my hand.

“It happened a long time ago,” says dad.

“Thirteen years ago yesterday,” Mom adds.

“What? My acne?”

What on earth are they talking about?

Dad chuckles. “Kristy, I need to tell you from the beginning. Please, just listen.”

My mom looks at me, tears in her eyes. “Hon, we were told we could never have children. Ever. I was diagnosed with Endometriosis.”

Okay, whatever that is.

“So,” says Dad, “We wanted desperately to have a baby, but well, since we couldn’t we thought of adoption...”

OH MY GOD! I’m adopted. But wait—that means Macie is adopted too. That totally explains a lot then.

Then I think—I have real parents out there. Somewhere.

Who didn’t want me.

My face contorts, and if I had tears, they’d be streaming down my face about now.

“So who are my real parents,” I ask, taking in ragged breaths.

“You’re not listening,” Dad says more firmly. “We thought of adopting, but we didn’t. WE are your real parents. We made you.”

“I still don’t get it,” I say impatiently.

“We made you. In the literal sense.”

I hate how Dad always talks in riddles. I stare at him, waiting for more of an explanation.

I seriously hope he isn’t going to give me a sex talk now. How embarrassing. Besides, I watched the Sex Ed video last year in school. They always treat me like a baby, they don’t think I know half the stuff I do.

“I don’t need a lecture on the birds and the bees. I know how babies are made and--”

Mom clears her throat. “What your father means is, we built you.” She grimaces as if she just ate something totally sour.

I look at them in disbelief, shaking my head.

“Kristy, you’re a robot.”

End of Snippet

So who came close??

Karen Amanda Hooper- you came close with saying she had chicken pox! She did indeed have bumps on her face, although it was liquified metalic robotic acne!

Diane K. Salerni- You were right with the messy bed head and pj's. Very accurate! Although I totally want her to wear nightshirt saying that now, how cute!

And a few of you said the typical average looking blonde hair hair pale skin which was also right, but I she doesn't have the blue eyes, she has brown, which I don't think anyone mentioned. Correct me if I'm wrong though!!

Thank you everyone, this was sooo much fun!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

MIDDLE GRADE WRITERS...You have been warned.

Okay, so what is with two posts a day two days in a row? It's a special week! And this is a special announcement. In fact, I've called in my special announcer person (different from Sunny my special tour guide person) who is none other than...Sofia! Yep, the main star of my debut book, Gossip from the Girls’ Room. She's acting a little diva-ish if you ask me. She thinks because she has her own book now that she should also get her own blog on here. But I compromised (for now).

Okay, it’s a FANTABULOUS announcement, not a funeral announcement.

Better! Now why don’t you tell our readers what this mayhem is really about.

Since you are known to be a bit of a gossip, how can our readers know that what you said is, in fact, not gossip?

Um, yeah. Okay so that was fun. Anyways, we invite you! Yes, YOU! To become a follower  stalker of PROJECT MAYHEM!

TEAM MAYHEM (in order of release):

Dawn Lairamore, IVY'S EVER AFTER, 5.15.2010
Dee Garretson, WILDFIRE RUN, 8.31.2010
Adam Jay Epstein, THE FAMILIARS, 9.7.2010
Andrew Jacobson, THE FAMILIARS, 9.7.2010
Hilary Wagner, NIGHTSHADE CITY, 10.01.2010
Tim Power, THE BOY WHO HOWLED, 10.26.2010
Rose Cooper, GOSSIP FROM THE GIRLS’ ROOM, 1.11.11
Jen K Blom, POSSUM SUMMER, 10.2011
Marissa Burt, THE TALE OF UNA FAIRCHILD, 01.2012

To get this new blog going, we need your support!! And THAT, my friends, is non-gossipy fabulous news that you can feel free to spread wildly!

Are YOU ready for the mayhem?

*If you missed my first post of the day, check out Guess That Character! So much fun!

Guess That Character!

Guess That Character Blogfest is Jen's fabulous idea, and it all began with this question:

What if what I imagine my character to look like is someone different then what you as readers would choose?

Below I've included a snippet from one of my stories. Based on your first reaction of this character through her actions and dialogue only, leave a comment on your impression of her and what you believe she looks like. Tomorrow I will post what she really looks like and we'll see who came the closest!!

A Snippet of Kristy...
I jump off my bed and throw the door open, looking into my Mom’s panic stricken face. She sees me and gasps, taking a step backwards. She hollers for my father, not taking her eyes off me for a second.

“Jonathan? Jonathan! Come quick!”

Whatever happened to comforting your kid and assuring them everything is all right, even if it isn’t? Did I lose that privilege yesterday when I turned thirteen?

“What is it, Mom?” My voice quivers as I ask. I feel like an elephant is sitting on my chest, suffocating me. I take short, quick breaths. What is happening to me?

I see my dad running up the stairs, his coffee mug in hand and a pen clenched between his teeth. He’s still in his robe and his hair is completely disheveled. He must’ve pulled an all nighter again.

“What’s going—?” He takes a deep breath and looks at me with wide eyes.

“This, this is spectacular!” His face lights up as he walks around me, looking me over from head to foot, before settling on my face again.

“Anything else happen to you?” He asks me. “Besides...this?”

“Anything else?” I feel the heat rising to my face. “Are you serious? Isn’t this enough for you?”

“Absolutely incredible,” he whispers, more to himself than me.

I look to my mom, hoping for an explanation. She has yet to blink, her mouth agape, and her right hand is clutching her throat.

I see Macie’s head popping up behind my parents as she tries to stand on her toes to peek over.

“Well?” I say, throwing my hands in the air. “Are you gonna stop gawking at me like I’m some circus freak and tell me what’s going on?”

My fear is turning to anger. WHY won’t they tell me anything? I have a right to know.

Complete silence. Then I hear my sister giggle.

“This is so not funny, you little twirp!”

“Hey--,” she yells, but my parents don’t seem to even notice.

My mom’s hand shakes and she drops it to her side. “Lets go down to breakfast and talk about it,” she says.

“In fact, lets skip school today,” Dad chimes in.

“Yay! No school!” my sister jumps up. “I guess it’s good have a sister who’s a freak after all.”

“Shut up!” I yell. Eight-year-old sisters are such a pain.

My dad turns to Macie. “You do have to go to school.”

“What?” she whines. “But that’s not fair! If I look like her, can I stay home too?”

End of Snippet

So give me your best guess and remember, the big reveal is tomorrow!

Check out the other participants HERE and take a guess at their characters too!!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Informal Book Club

I'm part of this exciting opportunity through Jen's Blog,  so now I'm looking for six people who would also love to join in on this fabulous fun!

Informal Book Club

There is no money involved so it is legal and fun.

All you have to do is send a book (paperback, audio book, hardcover) that you have already enjoyed to the person listed on the back of the sheet I will mail to you. There is no need to box the book you mail; a mailing envelope is fine. Be sure the book you send is still in good condition, we don't want anyone being shorted out on the fun.

How do you know where to send the book to?

The letter that will be mailed will have a address label listed on the back (that is where the book will be sent) from there you will make 6 copies of the letter and attach the 6 address labels I provide for you. Find 6 people you would like to join in on the fun and send the letter (with my address label on the back) and 6 address lables of your own (loosely in the envelope) so you can receive books.

What's the point of this? Sending out 6 letters means you will eventually get 36 books for FREE!!!! You are only sending letter amongst friends and people you know so you can already see how much fun and how easy this will be!! It will be interesting to see what kind of books you'll receive!!

So who wants to join??? If you absolutely cannot resist, all you need to do is be one of the first SIX commenters to write "yes" and include your email address. I will then contact you for your snail mail add and mail your letter to you. How cool is that?!

ONE MORE THING - only sign up to do this if you are able to send out your book soon (within a few weeks of when you receive the letter) so that we can be fair to all participants. I don't want anyone waiting to get their novels.

BTW - Tomorrow is Guess That Character Blogfest! So be sure to check out my blog to tomorrow to read a snippet from one of my books and guess my characters description!

PS- Check out my other blog post for today, Gossip From the Girls' Room-ARC's!

Gossip From the Girls' Room- ARC's!

I pulled a Jen today and i'm doing a two post day. Why? Because I have such terrific news it deserves it's very own post!

(Summary from inside cover)
Sixth-grader Sofia Becker writes a blog about everything she overhears in the girls' bathroom,
especially mean things about the super-popular Mia, but comes to realize that gossip
has consequences and popularity is hard to achieve.

My ARCs of GOSSIP FROM THE GIRLS' ROOM, A Blogtastic! Novel came in the mail yesterday! I got to hold my book for the very first time. Ever. It was...strange. Looking at all the text and illustrations come together to form a solid ,published book just feels so surreal. It's not something I have to go online to look at anymore, I can actually hold it, turn it over in my hands, flip through the pages. It's the moment that I've waited for since...well, forever.

I look at the illustration on the cover and I think, "I remember drawing it but I don't feel like I drew it." Same with the text and inside illustrations. The ARC's I have are paperback, whereas when the books hit the store shelves it will be hardcover. But the book now is so super cute and I absolutely adore it. Now, I'm totally eager for people to read it!

Here's the thing. I only received four ARC's. I will be getting more, I'm just not sure when. So my problem is figuring out how to make the most of these four books for now. Right now I can tell you I'm keeping one, so that leaves me with three. What to do with the remaining three?

I want it to get some exposure. I want people to read it who really want to read it. I'm torn between several different things. For starters, I'm still thinking about doing a blog giveaway. But I don't know what yet. I want it to be something more creative than just "leave a comment and you'll be entered to win" type thing.

Second, I want to give one to a blogger who will do a review of it on their blog and post to Amazon. But who and how do I make that decision?


How and what would you decide if you were in my shoes? Which, by the way, are a 7 1/2 and quite fashionable.

PS- You can check out my other blog post for today, Informal Book Club, and join in on the fun!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Getting Old(er)

Before I signed with my agent, I used to be a humor writer for print and online magazines. It's been fun reading some of my old articles, such as things to do at Walmart if you're bored (a must try list!) and what happened when the Hamburglar was replaced by an actual fry thief (true story!).  So, I thought I could eventually share these on the blog. But for today, I decided to post about age. And although I'm not WAY old and I don't feel old at all (my mind is in age denial), I sometimes do or say things that make me think, "Omigosh, I'm totally old for just doing/saying/thinking that!" or "I sound just like my mother!" 

So I kind of joke about the whole age thing. Like my mom, she's been 28 for as long as I can remember. Some of you probably haven't even reached your 24th birthday yet, but how many of you have celebrated your 25th birthday for the last ten years? Twenty? Even though we're in age denial, there are are some signs we can't deny that  prove we might be getting a teeny tiny bit older. Such as:

1. You walk into a room and forget why you’re there. Repeat four times before realizing you just wanted a drink of water.

2. You’re asleep, but other’s worry you’re dead.

3. Your friend is dating someone more than half their age, and isn’t breaking any laws.

4. People call you at 8pm and ask, “Did I wake you?” They did.

5. Happy hour is a nap.

6. You have a party and your neighbors don’t even realize it.

7. You have more hair in your ears than on your head. And you don’t care.

8. It takes three tries to get up from the couch.

9. It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.

10. You sink your teeth into a grilled cheese. They stay there.

11. The twinkle in your eye is just the reflection of the sun on your bifocals.

12. You can’t remember where you put you’re glasses.

13. An hour later you remember you’re wearing your glasses.

14. You sit in a rocking chair, but you can’t get it going.

15. You’re secrets are always safe with your friends because they can’t remember them.

16. You don’t worry about tying shoelaces. All your shoes are slip-ons.

17. Adult diapers? Actually, they’re kind of convenient.

18. You look both ways before crossing a room.

19. Your worst enemy? Gravity.

20. You see toys from your childhood. In a museum.

21. Your knees buckle. Your belt won’t.

22. You start every sentence with “Nowadays…” or “When I was your age…”

23. Someone says it’s windy today, and you reply, “No, it’s Thursday.”

24. You pet your cat on the bathroom counter. It’s really your toupee.

25. You get winded on the stairs. Going down.

BUT, look on the brightside. There are many perks to getting older, right?  Such as closer parking, discounts, and the fact that you're least likely to get kidnapped.

In fact, you can still play your favorite games. Just… mildly altered.

1. Sag, You're It!
2. Spin the Bottle. Of Mylanta.
3. 20 questions. SHOUTED INTO YOUR GOOD EAR.
4. Doc Doc Goose.
5. Simon Says (something incoherent).

And just remember: The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs!

Friday, August 13, 2010

No Spllenig Erors

We all make spelling mistakes, who isn't thankful for spellcheck? But what about obvious, painful spelling mistakes that are totally public--and embarrassing?  A few weeks ago I noticed a restaurant by my house that had a HUGE adverstising sign out front that said "New Onership."  Okay, you have to wonder why this person DIDN'T have this checked out before--and why nobody else noticed? And then you have to wonder what kind of owners took over this place. And hopefully the food is better than their spelling!

Here are some other slightly obvious spelling mistakes that you can't help but cringe when seeing. Can you imagine what these people thought when they finally realized their errors. All I can say is, I hope I don't have one of those days!

Remember, only Nuns can drop off cans!

Hmm, I don't remember being taught that in school either.

My guess is that a Harvard graduate did NOT make this.

Perhaps this is just a faster way to say no smoking while working?

But what about the low ceiling?

*shakes head* no comment

But officer, the sign didn't say stop.

This one takes the cake.

Sorry dude, but you're not as awesome as you think!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Achy Breaky Art

I have an art show coming up the end of September, it's a Sci-Fi/Horror show and I'm sooo looking forward to it. BUT, I have to make some new art pieces because, well, I haven't made anything new since March of this year for the Alice in Wonderland Art Show. I've been so busy with my writing deadlines and now, even though i'm working on something underwraps right now, I have that little bit of extra time to create some new pieces. Yay!

So last night I bought paper clay and decided to try my hand at bringing my characters to life. You know, the super big eyes, straight noses, sorta creepy looking but loveable. How perfect for the upcoming show, right? I could totally creepify them even more. Well, I started small and I'll have more pics to share later, but the first thing I made (and don't laugh--this is my first time ever using paper clay and trying to sculpt!)-- is the head of an art doll of one of my characters. The picture is just the actual clay, it still needs to be painted and have hair and everything, but this is the first stage. I have a hole at the top where I will put in a ribbon so this one can be hung. I will make some kind of ghostly, transparent dress that will flow around her body, adding arms and legs as well. I will probably paint her skin all white and give her some freakishly out of control frizzy bed head for hair. I want her, in the end, to have a "haunted" look. So, this is my before and  by next week I'll post the "after" pics and we shall see if she lives up to her expectations.

Here are some other art pics I drew from early on, showing the before/after and some of the stages. You can see my other post, Don't Have An Art Attack, where I show some others.

THE GARDEN Ink drawing on cardstock

LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD (before) Ink sketch
 (after) charcoal & oil pastel on 8x8 panel

WHY ME? (before) pencil sketch (after) charcoal & ink
decoupaged onto wood and handmade paper (Sold)

TOASTED (before) Pencil & Ink Sketch
TOASTED (after) Framed, Charcoal & Ink 11x14 (Sold)